.pull out the stops.
So I have a victory to announce.
When I started my daily marches up the hill to the house I probably stopped five or six times on the way up every time. Soon after starting I began to try to cut out the stops, and started trying to cut down my time.
Two weeks ago I brought it down to two stops. Tonight for the very first time I've got it down to ONE STOP. I am more excited than I can explain. I think I might be able to go on the Juan de Fuca hike at the end of the year, for the first time this actually seems like it could be possible for me.
I'm realizing that so much of this is mental prep... once I cut out a stop, I dont need it anymore, but it's so hard to get past the mental hurdle of cutting it out. Somehow it's like my ability to breathe becomes dependent on knowing that I can stop in the near future.
MAN. It feels AWESOME to be conquering this bit by bit! Unfortunately celebrating with the house seems a little lame. For me, making one stop on the way up the hill is a colossal victory, for other people in the house, needing to stop on the way up the hill would be unthinkable.
There's just some stuff that can't be understood if you're not in the same headspace. I've never done anything like this before in my life... that's a hard place to imagine yourself in if you've always been active. The thing is, they all care about me, and probably want the chance to celebrate my victories... without my pre-judgement on their ability to empathize with me.
Well then, that's settled. I'm going to go upstairs and drink juice with my housemates in celebration. One more stop to go.
So I have a victory to announce.
When I started my daily marches up the hill to the house I probably stopped five or six times on the way up every time. Soon after starting I began to try to cut out the stops, and started trying to cut down my time.
Two weeks ago I brought it down to two stops. Tonight for the very first time I've got it down to ONE STOP. I am more excited than I can explain. I think I might be able to go on the Juan de Fuca hike at the end of the year, for the first time this actually seems like it could be possible for me.
I'm realizing that so much of this is mental prep... once I cut out a stop, I dont need it anymore, but it's so hard to get past the mental hurdle of cutting it out. Somehow it's like my ability to breathe becomes dependent on knowing that I can stop in the near future.
MAN. It feels AWESOME to be conquering this bit by bit! Unfortunately celebrating with the house seems a little lame. For me, making one stop on the way up the hill is a colossal victory, for other people in the house, needing to stop on the way up the hill would be unthinkable.
There's just some stuff that can't be understood if you're not in the same headspace. I've never done anything like this before in my life... that's a hard place to imagine yourself in if you've always been active. The thing is, they all care about me, and probably want the chance to celebrate my victories... without my pre-judgement on their ability to empathize with me.
Well then, that's settled. I'm going to go upstairs and drink juice with my housemates in celebration. One more stop to go.
1 Comments:
congratz on making it up the hill!
great blog..good posts..keep up the good work.
if you come to mine, please place a pin in the map! :) and comment!
thanks!
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