(and you thought I was kidding).

Introducing... my immortal pets!

They are named Unsterblich and Ewig. Pronounced "ooonsterblik and eh-vig". Meaning "immortal" and "forever" in German. Here they are in their cage.

Me and Ewig, bonding. Note her appearance of overall immortality and good health.

Me feeding Unsterblich. I don't have to feed him. I just want to. Take that dog-mommies.

So happy together.

My sojourn into pet ownership has taken a new turn. As far as I'm concerned, the furry (mortal) ones can go break someone elses heart. As for me? I've got Unsterblich and Ewig in a tank in my room. They're quiet. They're tidy. They don't move much. But most importantly of all, they are immortal!

get yours today.